"I gave scares but I never killed anyone," he said. "I couldn't. I never hurled a grenade in a public place."

His greatest achievement was opening fire on the cavalcade of a visiting Indian government minister.

Even when his team caught a police informant, Shakeel called for him to be set free. "I thought I would set an example. Forgiveness is better than killing."

In 1994, when he was 16, he was arrested and taken to a military barracks. Of the 20 boys and young men who had crossed the border to Pakistan with him, only eight were still alive.

Shakeel was tortured. He was stripped, doused with water and given electric shocks. A nail was pushed through his jaw (he showed me the scar). His head was immersed in water.

When he was released, he remained under police surveillance. An injury to his right arm as a result of the torture had left him unable to lift anything and he has relied on his brothers to support him since then. Shakeel is still unemployed and says he feels as if he is 110 years old...

There are millions being brainwashed, raised up to be suicide bombers, and they want to kill .. kill .. kill. When they start using dirty bombs in western cities perhaps our governments will begin to get the message we must take this more seriously. I frankly don't care about what motivates them. If the Indian military has been harsh I do not condone it. It's wrong. However, when Hindu pilgrims are shot dead on the way to their shrines repeatedly it leads to excesses from their military. People get tired of being the brunt of Islamic rage. Too many have been killed by it all over the world.